this husband thing

so park has m a j o r jet lag. the past couple of nights he has passed out around 6:30pm & then he sleeps till about 4 in the morning; its rooouuughhh. come on india, you just took sugar daddy for 12 days and now this? 

only upside: lots of time to think (and read, watch my shows, do face masks) ha but mostly think.

life in this moment feels so endless. but then i talk with my parents or grandparents and they claim the opposite; that life is “gone in a wink”. which makes me wonder what the heck im doing with my wink

marrying my best friend/lover/partner in crime is the best thing that has ever happened to me. it has grounded me, made me confident & brought a whole new level of love for our savior. 

since about the time we got engaged i have had some family + personal challenges that have tested my foundation. i was always raised to “put on a front”; you know… “beast it” (please tell me you’ve seen beasts of the southern wild- a m a z i n g) but it got to a point where i just couldn’t anymore and i realized it was totally okay to let go. 

to just collapse + cry because park has my back. marriage is so crucial because we need that. we can only be superwoman for so long. and i am so grateful for that blessing; that heavenly father sent me this knight in shining armor. 

its the real deal this marriage thing, youve gotta try it 

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a year

its spring break. holyyyy junk. its been one year since sugar daddy and i took that fateful ride from farmington to rocky point

one year since i fell in love with his grandpa like driving + addictive smile

its been one WHOLE year since our first kiss; man, time is a sneaky little snake. well i am back on the path of our love in arizona (but alas without my hubs) but ive got the next best thing; miss kym, she is filling my days with sun, hummus and getting swoll | and by swoll i mean her, she is an animal; im just over her getting itchy from the pre workout. oh and i lost my big toenail, it looks perfect {so do my grass vball scars, mmm}

i just adore arizona. its sunshine really brightens the damp soul of someone who has been trying to survive a logan winter.

photo 1 photo 2 photo 3 photo 4 photo 5

oh + probably need to out our engagement vid on here- badaaa ding bada boom

whip cream wedding dress

We live and we learn… a lot.

It is strange how quickly we evolve through each stage of life. At one point only concerned with the Friday night football- to planning a life, a life in which your decisions will shape a husband and a family.

We are sent here to learn. To learn to love, I believe, is on the top of this list. To create true relationships. By true I mean honest. I also mean open, forgiving and warm. Jealousy should be abolished (oh, except for that “you are my man” kind) and each day should be an opportunity to seek out the best in your other half. And everyday should also be an opportunity to seek out the not-so-good in you, the static, the mean and throw it out.

As a girl I have always dreamt of that fairytale wedding. Flowy chiffon, lace details and flowers so full you could drown in there scrumptious petals. Oh! And we mustn’t forget the velvety cake and perfect love songs. I’ve realized, that it might rain on that day and there might be gossipy-whisperings and the cake might fall. And I’ve realized that in the end what really matters is the commitment you made. The foundation you’ve set out to build, the love you’ve promised to give and the family you intend to create.

I’m no Dr.Phil, Oprah or even experienced on this subject for that matter but I’ve lived a little bit of life. I’ve been testing this theory out lately and the outcome has been a brilliant, still unavoidably messy, but oh-so-sweet relationship. So, if you are preparing to wed or trucking along to make your marriage blossom take this to heart.. or at least ponder and let me know what you think.

Think of your current situation as a giant Thanksgiving feast! It is glorious and the build-up is a buzz of preparation. There is much to worry about but the star attraction is that juicy, savory turkey (I love the dark meat). Your relationship with your love should be this Turkey. Prepare your patience, finances, cooperation, in-law relationships. Prepare your temper and your jealousy. Get ready to work together as a united force. Once you believe your turkey is juicy, spicy, hot, crispy and stuffed with enough goodness to take on the hungriest, pickiest army… then you prepare the fixings. The homemade whipped cream wedding dress and the perfectly sage spiced mashed potato walls.

Because “where you invest your love you invest your life“.    – Mumford & Sons

Forever, Felica